When people think about themselves, they generally believe that they have control over their actions, that we consciously think about an action before making it. As it turns out, thought and action are not as simple as they seem. 

The most obvious example are reflexes. Most reflexes do not go to your brain to be processed, but rather involve a nervous pathway called a “reflex arc.” When receptors are excited, they send signals across a sensory neuron to the spinal cord, where this is finally relayed to motor neurons, creating a involuntary movement. This information, although not particularly surprising, still shows action and thought is not so simple. 

More interestingly, it seems that we make our decisions up to 10 seconds before becoming consciously aware of making the decision. This was tested by having participants choose between pressing two buttons and measuring brain signals. They showed flashing letters on a screen, and asked participants to memorize the letter when they made their decision to press one button or the other. They were able to see signals 7 seconds before participants “made” their decision, and with a few second delay in the imaging, this means that they were making their decision up to 10 seconds before pressing the button. 

Although picking which button to press might not seem important, this has serious consequences for the idea that we are the decision-maker in what actions to take. 

Research has also shown that actions have influence on our thinking. For example, most people make gestures when they talk. Gestures are purely representational actions, not done to achieve a certain goal. Studies have shown that these gestures do not just reflect what people are thinking, but also affect their thinking.

Now, once we realize that we are one tough son (or daughter) of a gun to understand and control, there are ways to guide our actions and thoughts to a better place. 

Self-affirmation can be a powerful tool. According to Oxford Dictionary, self-affirmation is “the recognition and assertion of the existence and value of one's individual self.” This is often done by repeating sentences about your own value and worth. 

It seems that this helps problem solving under stress, improves self-compassion, and compels physical activity by activating key regions of the brain's self-processing and valuation systems.

There are some guidelines to this: 

Self-affirmation isn't exactly about telling yourself how much you like yourself. Be specific about the good values you have. 

Do not lie about things that you don't believe. This can have the opposite effect by reminding yourself of your deficiencies.

Use effort-based self-affirmation. Saying something general like “I’m a good person,” or “I’m smart” does not have the same effect as “I will work hard” or “I am a hard worker” according to research. Hard work and effort is something we have control over (at least to a certain extent) compared to talent and ability. 

In the words of the great Shia LaBeouf, “JUST DO IT.” While it's obviously easier said than done, there are some strategies to start taking action.

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is a common type of action-oriented psychotherapy, with a lot of evidence supporting its effectiveness. There are six key ideas from ACT.  

1. Acknowledge the all of your thoughts and emotions, including all of the negative ones. Accept that you cannot control your thoughts directly. 

2. Step back from your thoughts and observe them without judgement.

3. Focus on the present. 

4. Understand that people are more than thoughts, feelings, and experiences.

5. Find what your core values are and stick to them.

6. Take action in line with your values and positive change.

While all are important, the key ideas to me are 5 and 6. Sometimes, we also need to act before finding what we truly value, so a good proxy is to look to people who you respect. Ask “what would they do.” Imagine the ideal version of yourself and ask them the same question. 

This makes it easier to act, without having to think explicitly about what things you value. They say that “practice makes perfect,” so “practice who you want to be”. Eventually, who you want to be might change, but we can usually make sure the trajectory is in the right direction. 

This even applies to our posture. A study from 2010 found that power posing, whether putting your feet on the desk or adopting other poses that are associated with dominance, increased the amount of testosterone. Sometimes, when we want to feel strong, we have to act strong first.

All in all, we are complicated and sometimes annoying difficult beings to control. But once we accept this reality, we can take real steps to take action.